Monday, November 29, 2010

The Results are in: I SUCK.

I knew eventually it would catch up with me. What is "it". Oh you know.
A little bit of this and a little bit of that. 

Y'get to point where you say to yourself, "Self, do I go grocery shopping or run or blog or work?"

Tough decision given that without groceries, the family gives me thatover the glasses look. 

Without running, then I have ONE GIGANTIC MARATHON FAIL in January.

Not that I haven't failed before. In fact, I do THAT quite well.

Let's be honest, without a paycheck really none of this could be possible. Fine, I could still run, but I wouldn't look nearly so damn CUTE.

That leaves me with a.) Ignoring the kids and Blog  b.) NOT ignoring the kids and NOT blogging.

could I flip a coin on that one? 

Nevermind--WHERE shall I start?

How 'bout here:




I GOT MY ASS HANDED TO ME AT THE TURKEY TROT.

Yep, that's how it was.

First the 16 year old beat me.

Then, the pilgrims beat me.

I did HOWEVER finish before the Turkey.

That's a positive, right? 

I'd loved to make up some excuse about the "altitude" or the "horrible hills" or that "it was just a training run". 

But they'd all be lies. I live here. altitude = non-issue.  Hills? Umm, not.so.much. Training?

I TRAINED MY FREAKING BUTT OFF TO BEAT THAT PUNK.

I even tried to tie his shoelaces together (you didn't hear that from me).

I tried to hide his timing chip. (No, really, I did).

WHAT MORE DO I HAVE TO DO????

I'm 43. He's 16. 

No fears, my dear friends. I have a plan. Everyone knows the body peaks at around 25.

I will simply play the waiting game. I'm a patient person.

Yessirreee. I will keep training. Knowing that in 10 years, when I am 53 and he is 26.  I WILL BEAT HIM as his cardio vascular performance begins to suffer. (Because, let's be honest: How many of YOU were running when you were 25? not many.)

In 10 years, It's SO ON!

6 comments:

LBTEPA said...

he obviously cheated

TiffersRunsTX said...

You are too frickin' funny, hon.

Wes said...

it's critical to be waiting when the turkey arrives.

Nicole @ Geek Turned Athlete said...

You don't SUCK! Oh please! You will get your speed back. I've lost mine lately b/c grad school is kicking my ass and the weather has been really crappy to run in. Excuses, excuses. I know! But just so you know, I have very similar conversations in my head about choices!

Titanium said...

I like your plan. I may have to implement one of the same here shortly.

Oh, and you totally don't suck. The 16 year old wouldn't even be able to find your tracks with a GPS if you both ran an ultra. Young muscles can motor through the short distance stuff with excellent speed, but it takes gnarly grit to take on the grinders.

Bill said...

Now you are ready, padawan.

Embrace the suck, love it for what it is and don't care what the 16 year old can do. Because we know that you can hand him his arse any time you want.

And if he doesn't believe you, quit making dinner. ;^p